Thursday, December 3, 2009

why i can never be an abercombie model.

as i child, i wanted to be many things: a house painter, a firefighter, a teacher, an NBA player. none of these came to pass as i was too short or my parents did not think those careers were suitable areas of employment for me. instead they chose the career of engineer, for which i was also not suitable for as i am quite possibly the worst engineer in the world.
well, as i got older, i found another profession that i thought was rather interesting. that of an abercrombie model. however, that obsession was quickly derailed as i noticed one glaring characteristic that i lacked.

how is that possible?!

honestly, is it just me, or do abercrombie models have obscenely long lower abdomens? apparently, this is known as the "abercrombie V" as stated on urban dictionary. do guy really wear their pants that low on their hips? am i missing out on the latest fashion trend? i first remember seeing this look in fight club with brad pitt. and i thought it was just his amazingness that allowed him to look as he did. but now, every mall i go to i see...

maybe if you didn't wear your shorts so low, you wouldn't have to hold them up?
abercrombie must have a secret breeding ground for guys like this...

anyways, so i'm basically jealous of these models and their amazing bodies. i've even tried to model with my shorts as low as theirs.


seriously, any lower and my mother would not approve.

in other news, i've been good for 3 weeks now, spending most of my free time reading. and it's been ok. haven't found any amazing books since "catcher in the rye" though. i stopped reading that anti-fastfood book because it kept making me crave mcdonalds. "the beautiful game" was pretty good though. any book about basketball is good.

a beautiful book about a beautiful game on a beautiful day.

also, one of my new years resolutions for 2009 was to hang out with white people. and i finally did that last weekend. look at that multi-cultural-ness.

to tell you the truth, i can't tell any of these white people apart.

after hanging out with people that look like this for the first 22 years of my life...


it was rather refreshing to talk to whities. who also happen to be my favorite race.
but, honestly, i have a hard time telling you white people apart. i mean, you guys say asians all look alike, but i seriously cannot tell one white girl from another. it is something that i must work on.

lastly, i'll be going to tampa this weekend to watch the gatech/clemson football game. yes, you read that right. i'm mostly going so my coworkers stop looking down on me. one thing that white people love is NCAA football. they live and breath that junk. so in an effort to close the gap between me and them i decided to go to this game so they will think i am cool. i even bought new shoes for the event.

if they don't think i'm cool after this, i don't know what else to do.

and that's all i've got for now. just a quick post before i get ready for bed and the weekend. hopefully, i'll have a better worthwhile post when i come back. until next time, have a wonderful weekend and, as always, safety first.

14 comments:

Pierce said...

For a while I legitimately thought I was the only white person you knew, and eff you... all Asians look alike. Love the posts man.

mikle said...

john. it's called the art of a beautiful game.
and can i borrow it.

Princesstine said...

the "v" is very achievable! my ex had one. too bad he's my ex.

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